Top 10 Ways to Know You Have
Joined the Wrong Church

10. The church bus has gun racks.

9. The church staff consists of the Senior Pastor, the Associate Pastor, and the Socio Pastor.

8. The Bible they use is "the Dr. Seuss version".

7. There's an ATM in the lobby.

6. The choir wears leather robes.

5. Worship services are B.Y.O.S. (bring your own snakes)

4. No cover charge, but communion is a two-drink minimum.

3. The pastor regularly attends meetings in Las Vegas and Atlantic City.

2. Ushers ask, "Smoking or Non-Smoking?"

1. The Women's quartet are all married to the pastor.